1. |
The Killer, Majestic
04:22
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No longer just a witness
Much more than a statistic
Rein in the new aesthetic
Blood-stain the perfect canvas
Mother said I was the son of the morning
Father said I was a son of a bitch
I don't think that I'm your son at all, man
Just an ever-present itch
In the mind of a reputation
Omnipresent revolution
I am the goddess of my own fate
And I'm here to give it all away
Are you listening?
Because I've started speaking.
Gonna rip off the heads of the martyrs
Gonna flash all the non-believers
Gonna tear apart the power structures
Gonna spill my guts on strangers
Gonna wave my big, black flag
Tear out my heart and put it in a bag
Throw it in the river, watch it get dragged
To the bottom of the universe and never come back
Loud movement, prying eyes
My nightmare come to life
I'm squirming, affirming
Rebirthing, usurping
Claws digging, mouth grinning
Skin stretching...
Free us from the confines of our flesh
Choose wisely while you rot.
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2. |
FALSE.
03:41
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This isn't what I wanted
This isn't what I asked for
I've been asking all these questions
The answers only lead to more
Can we please just go home?
Because I can only kill the feeling
When I'm alone... I'm always alone
Should I bleed out hormones?
Should I be the laughing stock of all my friends?
Should I be a cheap whore?
Should I be an object to covet?
Every second is a chance to break away
Gonna stand up and scream what I've got to say
Not gonna let this be the end of me
Should I be the master?
Should I be the slave?
Should I be the glowing savior,
Or the one dying in vain?
Can I just be a child?
Mother, wrap me in your arms
Tell me I'm loved
This is not my heart
These are not my eyes
This is not my skin
This is not my life
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3. |
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Here's another song for all the nosy little fucks back home
I do the same old shit, not like you deserve to know
Ain't gonna be no movie star
Just counting sins until I take one too far
Here's a new verse for the preachers and the damned
Can't buy heaven, we all got blood on our hands
Is anybody gonna pick you up?
Smile at the camera, try not to feel much
Can't sit still, doing way too many drugs
Can't save your life, but I can make dying fun
What makes you think I give a shit about life?
I keep breathing just to help the others fight.
Do they know that you're a fake?
Can you see it on their face?
Do you want an early grave?
One word and I'm on my way
Do they know that you're a fucking fake?
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4. |
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I am the voice of all of my dead friends
The ones that died an early, ugly end
The ones that chose the way they died,
And the ones killed by the badge we trust with our lives
For Leelah, Kyler and Ty Underwood
Because society is out for blood
For Tommy, Ronnie and the countless souls
Who never got a chance to grow old
Everybody get a fist in the air
Raise your voice and show the world that you're there
We're gonna hold our own,
And we won't do what we're told
We're gonna make our stand
Brothers and sisters all holding hands
We're gonna paint the whole city black
It's time that we fight back
Did you watch the evening news?
What's the point?
Nobody tells the truth.
Do you know what you're gonna do
When them legalized thugs with guns come after you?
Can you hold 'em with your M-16?
And fight off the new Gestapo regime?
The military industrial complex,
Well it says that you're next
Hey, yeah, if you ain't cis and white
Hey, yeah, they're coming for your life
Brutality, they try to cover and hide it
But I've seen the evidence,
And now I've gotta fight it
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5. |
SHOOT ME IN THE CHEST!!!
03:34
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I hope I get shot dead for playing this song
So society can learn some fucking right and wrong
Because right now you don't know anything
I hope I catch a bullet straight to the head
So you'll remember every word I've said
Because the ones who speak the loudest
Well, they're all dead
We're not gonna let 'em win,
Are we, girls?
Are we, boys?
Those in between?
Don't let them tell you that you can't be angry
You've got the right to be.
I hope they murder me for existing
Because my parts ain't up for discussion
And I don't owe you no explanation
I hope they stab me to death and call me a fag
Just as long as they know I ain't a dude in drag
Because I'd rather you just kill me for who I am
I hope they kill me in a nice community
It's the perfect opportunity
To spill my blood on high society
I hope they slit my throat on capitol hill
So you can make a stupid law and call it "Jamie's Bill"
Who's it gonna help if we're dying still?
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6. |
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“SERENADE US!”
“Won’t you play a little something for us?”
“Show me something that you’ve been working on!”
“Wow, you’ve got so much talent!
Ain’t no doubt about it!”
“When you make a CD I better get a free one!”
I wish that I could tell you
How it feels to be alive
I can’t begin to help you
If you won’t open your eyes
But if you want an experience,
I’ll take you for a ride
I’ll give you nightmares in your wet dreams
While we’re falling into the sky.
Everyone wants a product
A little piece of me
Something to show their family
From the show they got to see
I’m beautiful and sellable
Put my face on a magazine
But don’t dare ask how I’m doing
God forbid I show any humanity
You question all my methods
While I give you what you want
You wonder as I struggle
If I’ll ever be enough
Because you are just a voyeur
To you I’m just a slut
But tell me something babe,
Does your insecurity match your studs?
Go take a bunch of acid
Go live a fucked up life
Go try to take a piss
What's it take for you to die?
Go live it for yourself
Go write your own damned songs
Because all this has ever been
Is just me having a little fun.
Show me all the songs,
All the songs you want to play
While you’re pounding on the strings of my heart
Show me all the ways,
All the ways you want to die
I could kiss you once and tear your world apart.
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7. |
So, I Was Thinking...
05:22
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You make it painful not to fall for you
Even though I know it's against all the rules
You don't see how lovable that you are
But I've always known because I did from the start
I was just living my life and then you happened to me
And when my eyes caught you,
There was nothing else I could see
And I know you didn't mean to take it,
But my heart's in your hands
So if it's all the same tonight, you got any plans?
I want to take you out and make you laugh
And I want to heal all the scars living deep in your past
I want to show you what you look like to me
Something so perfect that I wish you could see.
Sometimes we fall too soon and call it a mistake
But I know just how it feels when you say my name
And I refuse to admit that I'm wrong
For being moved so much that my heart sang a song
So I was thinking we could do something
Me and you and maybe some of our friends
We could smoke and laugh and dream all night
And just pretend
Do you want to stay with me tonight?
We can hang with all of the streetlights
We can go anywhere you want
Or just stay in and hide
Just look at me with those eyes one more time.
Oh, there are so many rules for how it's supposed to be
But what do they have to do with you and me?
I'm just a dumb little girl who developed a crush,
"Silly little thing, don't you dare fall in love."
"Well I'm a punk, so babe, I'll do what I want."
But it gets so fucking hard when all I want is your love
You came and crumbled all these walls around me
And made the prettiest mess I think that I've ever seen.
So I was thinking we could do something
Me and you and maybe some of our friends
We could smoke and laugh and dream all night
And just pretend
Do you want to stay with me tonight?
We can hang with all of the streetlights
We can go anywhere you want
Or just stay in and hide
Just look at me with those eyes one more time.
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8. |
Bored To Death
04:06
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Hey there, little gorgeous
Would you kill us, pretty please?
I'd hate for you to wake and realize you're incomplete
The way it resonates into the places you hate
Inside yourself is what has brought you to life
The jars of pills and dollar bills have got you chasing cheaper thrills
Like pistols in the mirror every night
Exposing all your weaknesses,
Walking cliche, vapid mess
Reigning queen of all the pretty lies
Who are you?
What are you on?
What can you find?
What can you find for me?
Hey, to my dismay,
I'm bored to death and
I don't see it going away.
My dreams are little paperweights
They hold me to my current state
I float on life support in comfy haze
I'm sick to death of compromise,
Become a hack that I despise
Complete with cheesy lines to boost the hype
Quick, help me find an agent
I'll sell my soul and strike it rich
Tell me all the shallow things to say to get it over with
"Don't tell them how you feel."
"Don't tell them who you are."
"Don't tell them anything,
But what they'd profit from your art."
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9. |
Smile Full Of Dirt
03:07
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Jamie is awake now, so Jamie is afraid
Jamie is a good girl, but doesn't make good grades
Jamie is a sweet thing, but she's hard to love
And Jamie is a burden
To whoever grants wishes from the stars above
She smiles her lips to life
As she falls apart inside
Her friends' kind eyes so proud
As inside she falls to the ground
But smiles on the way down
Saint or a sinner, depending who you ask
But life gets hard when you leave a piece
Of yourself back in the past
She feels at fault for all things,
Even when she's done no wrong
And she'll internalize the universe
Until it comes out in a song
She smiles her lips to life
As she falls apart inside
Her friends' kind eyes so proud
As inside she falls to the ground
But now she smiles on the way down
You can never change what made you, you today
And don't you fear those memories
Because they taught you how to sing...
And bleed...
And fight...
And die trying to
Smile your lips to life
As you fall apart inside
Your friends' kind eyes so proud
As you lift yourself from the ground,
Smile when you look down.
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10. |
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I wish that I could stop it
And take it all back
I'd give anything to see them again
To feel the warmth of their conversations
To feel security
To never have to worry
To know that they were there and never leaving
Just five more minutes with no second guessing
Another small moment where it doesn't exist
Where we don't need names, just the company we're in
It's a specific kind of hurt we find ourselves in
Me, myself, I and all of my sins
We want to write you off
Like we're just cutting the fat
But the truth is every breath, I feel that knife in my back.
The empty where I find myself isn't empty
It's full of words I wish I said
When I was lost in the aether the first ten times
Now I've said too much
Written too many songs
Never stopped to deal
With how abandoned I feel
Isolate myself so that I can't be hurt
Second guess every one of your words
Fall into a moment with a smile I can trust
For five seconds, say my name's good enough
I'd do anything to feel like a person
Dreams should be an escape, and not a prison.
Mother, when you lie down,
Can you still see the knife?
When he says he loves you,
Can you still see the knife?
When you say you miss me,
Can you still see the knife?
When you deny any guilt,
Can you still see the knife?
I CAN STILL SEE THE KNIFE
No 426 Brown Street in front of me
Because when I think of you,
The knife is all that I see.
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11. |
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Well I guess by the time the weekend comes
I'll know if I'm with anything
Because I'm basing how I feel on how I look
On no more or less than what you think
All I want is to feel safe
And spend some time with someone
Who shines the same shade of insane
Well I guess by the time the morning comes
You'll know if I'm worth anything
See, I've done my best to grow and change
But I've lost the fight along the way
Watching all my friends grow up
And slowly poisoning myself
While they're having kids and falling in love
We were all just children
Living in opposite ways of the things that we'd say
When we got to this age on an internet page
The camera eats you alive
We thought it would settle itself,
With our souls on the shelves
And we wouldn't be held to the stories we tell
We sold our rebellion, now we're fat and old
Well I guess by the time that my time comes
I'll know if I'm worth anything
All the lies I told to keep my self good and stoned
I hope you forgive most of them someday
This is starting to feel like goodbye
So write on my headstone,
"The Girl Who Wouldn't Live A Lie."
Well I guess by the time the weekend comes
I'll know if I'm worth anything
We'll trade awkward stares,
Stutter through stories we'll share
And I might send you a desperate wink
Because I ain't here to pretend
We all want to be loved in the end.
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12. |
Lipstick Revolution!
03:56
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Are you tired of this shit?
Can you take no more of it?
Do you feel like you'd be better off on your own?
I know walking away is hard
But it's the only way you'll get far
Baby girl, sometimes you gotta walk all alone.
One, two, FUCK YOU!
I'm gonna lose a lot of friends
But this facade has gotta end
I can't stand to live my life dishonestly
Loyalty is back in style
In your shoes, I'd walk a mile
I don't need no one to live my life for me
Are you tired of this shit?
Can you take no more of it?
Do you feel like you'd be better off on your own?
I know walking away is hard
But it's the only way you'll get far
Baby girl, sometimes you gotta walk all alone.
I've been sitting idly by,
Watching you live out a lie
Kept my mouth shut while you made all of the plans
But I got sick to my stomach when I heard you speak for me
That kind of shit ain't what my dad would call "being a man".
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13. |
Escape Scene
06:57
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The time is ripe, I'll travel light
So nobody gets hurt
I can't stay now, the road has called
One last time, goodbye.
I'm gone, don't write to me,
I can't write back, it only hurts
Smash all my possessions that nobody will take
They'll be no use to you
I know that you're mad, but I don't know who at
This is the third girl I've been this year
I lie to myself as much as I lie to you
This is my chance to set the record straight
Wave goodbye to this circle town again
You knew that I would,
This time I swear it's for good again
The town that made me is the same one that erased me
But I won't shed a tear this time
This is my escape scene
We're all liars.
And I'll treat you just the same
You can't fool me with your plastic smile
Because we play the same games, you see
We sell our integrity
Because something's gotta pay the bills
We get so bored being each other's whores
So we fill ourselves with poison to feel
Play the game to buy back my name again
You knew that I would,
This time I swear it's for good again
The town that made me is the same one that replaced me
But I won't shed a tear this time
This is my escape scene
What have I become?
What happens if I don't run?
Will you right behind me?
And love me enough to tell me not to leave?
I'm sick of running
I'm sick of lying
I'm coming home
Because that circle town
Is the only truth
That I've ever known,
So I'm coming home.
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14. |
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Same as the original version, ya nerd.
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PLASMA CANVAS Fort Collins, Colorado
Preorder "DUSK", out 2/17/23 on SideOneDummy Records
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